I was just having a conversation on my Facebook page with a friend, inspired by this story. My posting that story was as a bit of a comparison to this story. The conversation was about how sad the world has become when men can’t just be men. In the first story, the girl’s boyfriend chose to run away from what may have been deeply buried, but was probably an instinct nonetheless- to take care of his woman and their unborn child, while in the second story, the man chose to do whatever he could to take care of his woman and child, and then grieved the loss of their child when the woman’s father forced her into an abortion. Here are two stories which plainly showcase the dichotomy between natural law and what is absolutely wrong in our society today:
We have lost our men.
Only it’s not that we’ve lost them during a battle in a foreign country at war. We have lost them right here at home —in our towns, and in our streets. We’ve lost them to the Sexual Revolution and the raging-feminist culture that seeks to destroy anything that resembles what men and women truly are at their core.
There is a strong debate, no doubt spurred on by this growing culture, on whether or not women need men for anything. At this point, as a whole, women have proven that we can be as strong and physical, most noted by success in joining the Armed Forces. We have proven that we can go into the work force and make as much if not more money than male co-workers, leaving little room for a need of financial support. We have even proven that we don’t need a man in a relationship because we can supposedly get as much, if not more out of a relationship with another woman. And children? Heck, if we want children, we can just find some random sperm donor at a clinic to provide for us. (Which, by the way, is a little sign that tells us we still need men in some way…Hmmmm…)
But it doesn’t end, there, really. Beyond the idea that perhaps we don’t need men at all, there is a growing idea that men don’t even have a voice. Turn on the TV and you see practically every male character in a comedy series playing a buffoon, or an inferior partner in the relationship; powerful women dominating their family life. They are cast as fearful blithering idiots that shut up and sit down the second a woman looks at them funny. But what we see on TV is not too far from real life. Men have been so emasculated by the culture of today that they are afraid to stand up for themselves, or women. They are afraid to show strength, integrity, self-respect. And they are afraid to even try to protect women. After all, women of today don’t need protection, do we? We’re too self-sufficient and powerful for that.
This isn’t to say that the problems of the universe are to be blamed on powerful women, or even so-called feminists who have made every attempt to put men “in their place” beneath them. It isn’t that black and white, and men do need to recognize their role and stand up for themselves. But there is a strong movement toward undermining and devaluing the role men play in society, making it that much more difficult for some men to even want to try. In an attempt to establish a sense of equality, society has crammed it down men’s throats that women are strong, independent and perfectly capable of taking care of themselves. In reality, this is ALL true. However, it doesn’t mean we don’t need men. It also doesn’t mean that men are just tools to be used for our purposes, or that their role in our life has little value. It doesn’t mean we are an oppressed gender needing to burn our bras and fight in often-nefarious ways in order to obtain our “freedom.” But who wants to stand up to those angry women who call themselves feminists but aren’t actually showcasing anything genuine and good about women? The ones who are demanding respect in the way of freedom from the “enslavement” of men at the same time as disrespecting everyone around them, including themselves? Not only are those women not authentic feminists but they are scary!! And the world has encouraged, ‘be afraid.’ So we are afraid.
And men buy it, hook, line, and sinker. They have been paralyzed by that fear and no longer have the encouragement, support or even the demand on their shoulders that they should have in order to take a stand in their natural roles as men, leaders, strong warriors…protectors.
But this alter-universe which is rapidly spinning completely out of control isn’t what reality is meant to look like. There is a specific uniqueness in the design of men, and of women. There is something about our innate abilities – which do not contrast but complement each other – that is not old-fashioned but timeless. Just because it is almost the year 2014 doesn’t mean men shouldn’t be allowed to play the role they’ve played in the world for thousands of years. Simply put, that is to be protectors. Strong women can have protectors. It doesn’t make any one of us less of a woman. It doesn’t make us less strong, less capable or less….anything. It makes us smart. Smart in the sense that we recognize and understand our unique femininity, and we are comfortable and confident enough in it to recognize the delicate balance between men and women, and the vital role men play in our lives.
I consider myself to be a pretty strong woman and I enjoy being viewed as “equal” to men when it comes to certain opportunities. But I don’t agree with the twist society has placed on various aspects of being a woman, and I definitely don’t like how the raging “feminists” of today have stomped out all but the very last shred of the world’s understanding of just how awesome women are. I don’t want them representing me as a feminist. I don’t want them telling the world that I don’t need a good, strong man in my life. Or that I am too strong to need protection. I feel like their efforts are counterproductive, and frankly, I don’t like how difficult they made it for me to find a decent man who would understand and respect me and my femininity, while at the same time feeling safe in his role as a man and his natural instinct to protect me when I need him to.
It’s been iterated and reiterated throughout this site that being a woman is beautiful, that we are supremely capable of so many things. That we can be strong and independent while at the same time recognize our femininity, and live fully content in it. Being an authentic feminist, however, does not mean shirking our identities as women or devaluing the role of men in our lives. A real feminist understands and embraces her role as a woman and all that entails, is confident in that role, and doesn’t need to act like a wild animal for the world to recognize the beauty and strength that lies within her. A real man respects a woman’s integrity and abilities, his own role and abilities, and will take seriously his responsibility as a man to protect — and go to great lengths to fulfill that role. Men need to start rallying again, digging deep to uncover the strength that lies at the core of their being. They need to start standing up again, for themselves and for those of us women who want them to.
So I just have one last thing to say, and this is directed at the men of the world:
I want to be protected.
A Strong, Capable Woman and Authentic Feminist
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